15 Reasons Your Dog is Smarter than You

Here are 15 things that I think make me smarter than my Humans. Not that I love you guys any less just because I am of superior intelligence.

15. The World may be your oyster, but I can go to the bathroom anywhere my heart desires.
14. You may think I serve you, but you really serve me. More Kibble please.
13. I am not afraid to love you unconditionally. My emotions don't get the best of me.
12. I never hold it against you. Forgiving and forgetting comes easily to me.
11. I don't beg, I divide and conquer. That's right Mom, I distracted you long enough to pull that sandwich right off the counter.
10. I am very Zen. Little things don't bug me like they bug you.
9. You run from insects while I chase and eat them. I mean, come on! They are tiny compared to you.
8. It doesn't take me 2 hours to get ready in the morning. I look good already.
7. I live in the moment and never worry about what happened yesterday or what might happen tomorrow.
6. I don't have to yell. When I show my teeth people know I mean business.
5. I don't communicate with you through baby talk and pet names.
4. When I want something I pursue it fearlessly.
3. I don't make mistakes I just learn my lessons.
2. I have sharp senses- my hearing, sense of smell, and instincts are far superior.
1. I don't have goals or agendas so I always succeed.